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Maybe a release for the week."Now close your robe and follow me . . ."
"I'm not dead yet . . ."
"I have a good friend named Bickus . . ."
"Excuse me, I speak jive . . ."
"Nazi's, I hate those guys"
"Kill anyone today?"
P
Follow Ups:
"He broke his neck trying to suck his own dick." -- Randall, Clerks, while describing how his cousin accidentally killed himself."It seemed like a good idea at the time." Mason Verger, Hannibal, after describing how he was convinced to remove the skin off his face.
There are also quite a few of them in Raising Arizona, a movie that some find extraordinarily funny (me), while other find it completely stupid. Too tired to remember the specifics though.
1
Dr. Strangelove: Jack D. Ripper explaining the importance of maintaining the purity of our precious bodily fluids.
yes, that's a gun in my pocket, and i'm happy to see you too.
"You gotta pool over there?"
"We have a pond in the back. We have a pool and a pond...the pond would be good for you.""So I jumped ship in Hong Kong, make my way over to Tibet and I get on a course in the Himilayas as a looper. You know, a jock, a caddy. So I tell 'em I'm a pro jock and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama himself! Twelfth son of the Lama, the flowing robes, bald... striking. So we get up on the first tee, he hauls off and whacks one - big hitter, the Lama - into a ten thousand foot crevass right at the base of this glacier. And he says, "Gunga Galunga... gunga, gunga-galunga." So we get up on 18 and he's gonna stiff me, and I say, "Hey! Lama! How 'bout, you know, a little something for the effort?" And he says, "There won't be any money here... but on your death bed, you will receive total consciousness." So I got that going for me, which is nice."
"She looks like a hooker. Look at her, look at her. Could you love someone who looked like that?"
"What are you talking about? Of course not. Five, ten minutes tops, maybe.""Has your father ever killed anyone before?"
"Oh, just a dog. Oh, and my Aunt Edna."
"Hey, you can't prove that, Rusty!"" I'd like to thank the Academy .. Academy for this .. for this beer, eh. It's a beauty. I'll put it on my mantle and uh, you know, try to keep it cold. "
"They got one big gun. They got a couple of tanks. They got a hundred Barishnikovs running around in Ichiwan outfits."
"Yeah, what do we got?"
"We got? What do we got? What are you talking about? We got one heavily armed recreational vehicle here, man."
Everything Lee Emry said in the first hour of Full Metal Jacket.The bus driver's response when Forrest Gump introduced himself.
"Guard, put this man in Cell #1 and give him a drink!"--Klan (Master Bong Soo Han) in Kentucky Fried Movie.
Chancy Gardener in "Being There"......."Yes, I would like a car."
Yeah Brain, but where are we going to find a tatoo parlor open at this time of night?
Fave from that show- "What is a Regis Philbin?" the Brain's answer during a Jeopardy taping episode.
Runner up- "I had a leak in the sink!" Mr. Dressup (...with apologies to the late Ernie Coombs!)
Dman
"Fly, Fat ass, Fly!!!"- Jay, from "Mallrats""Right about then, Spud, Sickboy and myself made a concious decision to get back on the herion as soon as possible- took about 12 hours." Renton, "Trainspotting"
"Nah, man! I'm just stumped that I don't have to pay him the 'hundred bucks!" Eric Cartman, "Southpark- Bigger Longer, Uncut"
"Mom, if you were in a German Scheiße video you'd tell me, right?" - Eric Cartman, "Southpark - Bigger Longer, Uncut"
How do you get fired on your day off?
Rob CThe world was made for people not cursed with self-awareness
Would I work in a place like this if I had a real snake?
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