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Get Ready for Fahrenheit 911 Lite

It seems the liberals are quite determined to convert us all before the election. Only from that position can one explain the influx of agenda-driven drivel.

Nine years ago a somewhat lame director Richard Linklater gave us a totally lame film about two young people meeting somewhere in Europe... and - imagine that! - falling in love, having sex and then heading in different directions. If Julie Delpy made some limited sense in the role of a French seductress, Ethan Hawke made no sense at all... a lover? Cut me a break.

Anyway... nine years passed, and the director felt another itch... to make a follow up. You know, like "A Man and a Woman: 20 Years later".

Obviously the director simply couldn't wait the prerequisite 20 years, so in his wisdom he decided: since the heroine is getting older and less sexy, and the hero - looking dumber today than he did nine years ago, the time for action was like NOW. So nine years it is.

I tried to watch the original film several times when it was on cable channels... each time with no success... a boring kaka so corny and tedious it made my whole body want something fresh and true - like a dip in the pool in the middle of November.

So how come I allowed myself be lured into seeing the sequel?

Well, we have friends. Most of them are liberal. Most of them love France. Most of them went today... plus I always considered Julie full of raw sex appeal... and her role in The Passion of Beatrice is not something any hot blooded male is going to forget any time soon. That fact alone spelled hope.

So we went.

OK, they meet in Paris... semi-accidentally, and they start talking. For some interesting reason the heroine is now a flaming liberal determined to save the world - ALL of it... the water, the air, the sun. But at least she does something about it, doesn't just talk, she worked in India and other places, and today she is with Green Cross.... figures.

Get ready now. For the first forty five minutes of the film you will be listening to nothing besides one liberal chiche after another. You will be exposed to ALL vices of American society (Surrre.... the Freedom Fries will get covered...), its materialistic nature, its limited people, then you will be told that only in Poland of 1995 could a person of integrity find peace and refuge from the consumption society... and on, and on, and on. No cliche left behind.

The movie is fortunately rather short at 88 minutes. Why, I have no idea, as certianly they could have covered more, except they suddenly realized the hormons were still there, and it was time to screw. It took them about ten minutes to realize that, and then another thirty to figure out where and how.

I think if they screwed on the fifth minute of the film and talked AFTER that, smoking and sipping the obligatory red wine, and then jumped each other's bones once again, the movie would have a leg to stand on, but the way it was, all the political talk did not much to convince most viewers to run and vote for Kerry, except I have to admit on a couple of occasions wind lifted Julie's shirt enough to ALMOST see her bra... so everyone stayed glued to their seats (except for my wife, desperate to find a shelter from that monumental pile of kaka anywhere possible.. in the restroom, in the hall, sleeping in her chair... nothing worked) eager to finally to see what we all came for - an uninhibited sex that only the French can do... or so our childhood cliche tells us.

Empty hopes. Julie starts swinging her hips rather provocatively, and the guy starts licking his lips in animal anticipation, but this is all you are gonna see, pal. For the 88 minutes are up, all liberal agenda covered handsomely, and the next show is in ten minutes, so please pick up your empty popcorn container and head out, thank you very much for visiting, and come again, when hopefully Julie has more time.





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    Topic - Get Ready for Fahrenheit 911 Lite - Victor Khomenko 13:24:40 07/04/04 (19)


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