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Escape to Alcatraz

(another tour de force from Duncan Shepherd)


Escape to Alcatraz


San Diego Reader, March 20, 2003

Duncan Shepherd hunts for an escape route.

Escape is an elusive concept. It's not uncommon when I have reached a conversational impasse on, for example, the latest James Bond or Austin Powers film, that my fellow converser will object, "But I go to movies to escape!" -- a durable alternative to "I go to movies for entertainment!" Nor is it uncommon for the author of a letter to the editor to attempt to draw the same distinction. For some reason this declaration never inspires me to want to climb down from my high horse and cry out, "But I go to movies to escape (or for entertainment)!" and then to throw my arms around the converser (or the correspondent) as a long-lost brother. I could say it truthfully enough, and yet I could not feel we were making any real progress toward rapprochement. One man's escape is another man's Alcatraz. To help clarify the situation, I have compiled a partial list of things I seem to get plenty of in my daily life, or in the daily news, and from which I would just as soon escape at the movies. Daredevil, Old School, Cradle 2 the Grave, Tears of the Sun, Bringing Down the House will not fill the bill....

money lust

corporate greed

profit maximization

the bottom line

the lowest common denominator

crass commercialism

insatiable materialism

conspicuous consumption

empty display

slick packaging

runaway inflation

puffery and hyperbole

grandiosity and pretension

blarney and blandishment

milking cash cows

flogging dead horses

tails wagging dogs

salesmanship

partisanship

upmanship

computers

television

cellular phones

answering machines

speeding cars

creeping technocracy

teen tyranny

sheeplike faddishness, lemminglike modishness, parrotlike apishness

copycattism, conformism, conventionalism

mind-numbing repetition and routine

Attention Deficit Disorder

"posture" and "attitude"

shallowness and superficiality

vanity and ego

obsession with body image

muscles on muscles

cosmetic surgery

soullessness

sameness

limited options and possibilities

insults to the intelligence

willful ignorance

lowbrowism

middlebrowism

highbrowism

hidden contempt

smug complacency and complacent smugness

smog

noise pollution

a cranked-up bass

rap, hip-hop, heavy metal, electric guitars

sensory bombardment

bids for attention

exhibitionism

infantilism

juvenilism

sophomoricism

four-letter-word wit

"cool"

"hot"

"awesome"

political correctness

political incorrectness

self-promotion

self-congratulation

self-consciousness

self-centeredness

"Me first"

"Who's number one?"

impatience

aggression

bullying tactics

competitiveness

boorishness

brassiness

abrasiveness

callousness

coarseness

crudeness

rudeness

recklessness

restlessness

sloppiness

purposelessness

pointlessness

chaos and confusion

inability to think one's way out of a paper bag

incuriosity

indifference

insincerity

dishonesty

disingenuousness

facetiousness

stupidity

timidity

denial

laziness

corner-cutting

slipping standards

standardization

extreme caution

the fear of the unknown

contentment with mediocrity and shoddiness

predigested platitudes and pieties

palliatives and placebos

obviousness and overkill

secondhandedness

triteness

triviality

garbage, rubbish, trash, litter, waste

life-imitating-schlock

tastelessness in all senses

thoughtlessness in all senses

tunnel vision

presumption and prejudice

provincialism and xenophobia

something less than chest-bursting pride, perhaps not all the way down to face-reddening shame, but at least a twinge of discomfort or unease, at being an American

ditto at being a human



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Topic - Escape to Alcatraz - clarkjohnsen 09:41:27 03/26/03 (2)


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