Films/DVD Asylum

Posted by Victor Khomenko (M) on April 20, 2006 at 06:07:47

...pile of crap!

I have sentimental attachment to Pushkin's novel in verse, and you can say this is a family affair (my wife memorized the whole huge work and read it to me aloud during our walks, one chapter at a time...), so I started watching it with great interest and expectation.

Very quickly that turned to frustration then irritation, then ridicule and then boredom.

The film is simply horrible, and considering Evgeniy Onegin is one of the pilars of the great Russian literature, it borders on blasphemy. It is simply a caricature, with just about everything in it out of place.

One interesting development - no doubt driven by an unbriddled desire to entice more of beer drinking American college youth into watching this marvel, is the creator's decision to throw in a hot sex scene between Tatiana and her husband. I say - given what he had already done to the original, why pussy-foot around by not doing the full frontal? At least the Caligula had the guts to give us the REAL XXX ordy at the end, so why not a good one on the ice of the frozen Neva river? I mean, fully naked babes and rich merchant's sons, hussars and aristocrats, all rolling on bear skins in a -40 temperature, body steam rising all the way to the golden domes of St. Isaac's cathedral?

But wait, there is more. In the original Lensky gets shot under his heart, drops his pistol and quietly falls down. Surely a boring, boring sight... that... What was truly needed was a wild-West style shooting, with a wictim getting shot in his forehead, blood and brain tissue gashing from the wound a'la JFK Zapruder's film, and the body being thrown back by some twenty feet. That looked rather refreshing, and I must admit - the horrible head wound looked quite real in a closeup. I was kinda disappointed though, that Onegin did not hold his flintlock pistol "gangsta style", horizontally. But perhaps not all is lost, and a good sequell will take care of those remaining minor points. Onegin II surely is coming...

To be sure, there are some redeaming qualities to this pathetic work, and these mostly involve the gorgous shots of St. Petersburg - these come through powerfully and grab you inspite of all those other things. But don't even mention the costumes and interior designs... these deserve a whole separate chapter.

This film should be viewed as a curiocity, as a traveling circus monster, a huge bearded woman... and for your Netflix buck-fifty it will perhaps give you an entertaining evening, especially if you are familiar with Pushkin work.

Did I forget to mention Onegin's obsene drawings, men with fully erected penis'? Let's just say - these put a nice icying on that already delicious cake.